Illogical-Beautiful-Perfect

When our family decided to adopt, we knew that we wanted older kids. First, we were approaching forty and were certain that babies would mean a quick and painful death to both of us. Secondly, older kids, especially boys, are in desperate need of adoption. Being a boy and older are two big strikes against a child that is searching for a family.

We put on our big boy (and girl) pants and waded out into the unknown waters of international adoption.


Boys need homes.
Let’s adopt a boy and, then, another boy.
 
Older children need homes.
Let’s adopt an older child, and, then, another older child.
 
It was that logical for us. God says take care of orphans. Then, we should take care of orphans. Our boys had a desperate need for a family. We chose to be that family.
 
That may have been the last bit of logic that we would ever encounter.
 
Because,
The illogical started to happen.
Two parents fell head—over –heels in love with two children that they had never met.
Two children embraced two broken—down, stranger, parents.
 
God, knitting us together
 
Something else illogical,
It’s hard.
The obstacles are huge.
The odds are not always in our favor,
But we don’t care.
 
Because, God is in this space.
 
Right here,
In the illogical.
 
Death for life.
That’s what He did for us.
 
Dying to self
 
Dying to the hard work.
Dying to the meltdowns.
Dying to the anxiety.
Dying to the tears.
Dying to their loss.
 
That’s what we do for them.
That’s what He does for us.
 
None of it’s logical. Laying down self to embrace the festering wounds of the broken. Spending a time-limited life on heartache. Fighting adolescent clocks to win the race to an independent adulthood. Holding on to Him so that we can hold on to them.
 
His love for us is not logical—that He would leave the eternal thrones of heaven to die for dust? –that He would feel hunger and the pull of sin for dust? –that He would die so that dust may live?
 
Illogical
But beautiful
And perfect
 
He lives in the spaces that we don’t understand.
His glory is in those places.
We reflect Him most in the corners of our confusion.
 
None of it’s logical.
But, it’s where love lives.
It’s where He lives.
 
 
Illogical
Beautiful
Perfect
 
 (c)2017 Victoria Paxton

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